Not Another One! – Most Pointless Film Sequels

Written by Bob Rogers
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                                                                                                                    As wonderful as the world of film is, it sure does love pointless sequels As wonderful as the world of film is, it sure does love pointless sequels

We’re massive cinephiles here at Zani. We live and breathe the media of film, reveling in the experience of sitting in a dark room, and watching as mesmerising narratives are spun before our very eyes.

Whether it’s a blockbusting superhero movie, an absorbing documentary, or even Guy Ritchie’s The Gentleman, as long as there’s an element of heart and soul to be found in the production, it’s one of the most enjoyable pastimes available.

However, one element of cinema that we really aren’t fans of, is the relentless outpouring of needless sequels. Sure, some sequels are absolute masterpieces of film-making magic (here’s looking at you The Dark Knight, The Godfather – Part 2, Terminator 2: Judgement Day, and Aliens) but a mass landfill of them are just a tedious re-hashing of a previously successful formula. Some of them though, are so unneeded that it’s pretty baffling that they got made. Well, as long as you ignore the screaming sound of greed that expels from them, that is.

Here’s a quick look, then, at some of the most pointless film sequels.

Jaws: The Revenge

The summer of 1975 is cemented into history as being the period when suddenly an immense mass of movie-goers stopped going into the sea. Why exactly? Because the original summer blockbuster, Jaws, scared the life out of nearly everyone that went to see it. Steven Spielberg's oceanic thriller certainly belongs on all the lists of greatest films ever.

What doesn’t belong anywhere near those lists is 1987’s Jaws: The Revenge. Releasing at the height of the slasher flick obsession, this ghastly film tries to turn a great white shark into a revenge-obsessed manic-killer, that manages to stalk an entire family across the world. If the premise sounds ridiculous, that’s because it is, and the execution is equally flawed, altogether resulting in a movie that makes a mockery of the first film’s excellence.

Rush Hour 3

The original Rush Hour Kung-Fu kicked its way onto screens back in 1998 was a massive global hit. The chemistry between its two stars, Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker, is still electrifying to witness even today. Both actors are full of relentless energy, with Chan providing the punches, and Tucker providing the wise cracks, resulting in a glorious send-up of the buddy cop movie.

The 2001 follow-up, Rush Hour 2, was more of the same, just with half the spirit removed, and the critics were understandably pretty damning. It did result in many ticket sales though, and so, even though the quality of the series was already noticeably struggling to tread water, six years later, Rush Hour 3 was released.

It’s not that the film is up there as one of the worst ever, it’s that it’s all so middling, it’s basically just ninety-one minutes of meh. The performances by Tucker and Chan are lethargic, the jokes are worn repeats, and all the writers have done is change the location to Paris. Even the fight scenes seem less hard-hitting, with a particular lowlight being a damp squib of a tussle in a casino, which takes place after a baccarat game.

Interestingly, Chan is a noted huge fan of the card game, which is no surprise as it’s popular all over the world. For example, you can discover the best sites for baccarat online, at the brilliant Asiabet portal. They have gathered together all the top baccarat options in one place, allowing you to find one that gives you what you want, whether that’s playing the game for free, or for real money. There’s also the opportunity to give live-card baccarat dealers a go, which is the closest you can get to stepping into a casino from your computer.

Home Alone 3

Sometimes, once in a blue moon, a film is created where everything just clicks. The performances are perfect, the writing is snappy and engaging, the soundtrack is heavenly, and the story never really dates. If you then set that film at Christmas time, then you’ve got 1990’s Home Alone. The 1992 sequel tried to recreate the magic, just this time in The Big Apple, and whilst it has its moments (mostly down to the genius of Tim Curry) it just couldn’t reach the heights of the original.

So, of course, everyone at 20th Century Fox decided there had to be yet another one. Thankfully, the star of the previous two, Macaulay Culkin, sagely opted out, which was perhaps his last wise career move. The film has a completely convoluted plot, that somehow involves mercenary spies and a remote-control car. It’s to be avoided like a paint can to the head.

 

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Read 305 times Last modified on Tuesday, 03 May 2022 11:02
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Bob Rogers

Bob Rogers

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ZANI was conceived in late 2008 and the fan base gradually grew by word of mouth. Key contributors came from those of the music, film and fashion industry and the voice of ZANI grew louder. So, when in 2013 investor, contributor and fan of ZANI Alan McGee* offered his support to help restyle and relaunch the site it was inevitable that traffic would increase dramatically and continues to grow. *Alan McGee co-founder of Creation Records and new label 359 Music..

 

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